HISSTERICAL DAY.... LITERALLY

Okay, I wake up this morning, and bleary-eyed, stagger into the kitchen to get a Diet 7-Up (I know, I know, its bad for me that early in the day, but that's not the point), and I spot, from the corner of my eye, what seems like a piece of thick black string next to Pete's shoes. I half consider picking it up and throwing it in the bin, and then walk away and figure I'll do it later, before instinct tells me to go back because the damn thing seems to be moving... Two whole seconds later I'm running to the room coz I can swear it looks like a snake, but I won't get close enough to check... So I drag Pete out of bed, who thinks its all one big joke, until my galliant hero finally agrees to come see.... At which point, instead of reaching for the first heavy, lethal item he can find, he goes back inside to get the blinking CAMERA and leaves me in the kitchen eyeballing the dang slithering thing!!! A snake. Like... argh. It was small and all that, but... argh. And of course, I'm wondering how the heck it could have gotten into the house, and if it decided to drop by alone! And it looked scary as hell. Being the swaku-snake hating-urbanite that I am, the only thing I can think to do in between freaking out is call the cops right (okay, so I tried NEA and AVA as well), and then just hope and pray the damn thing doesn't move right, but the cops take so long and we're so afraid the thing will disappear into the house that Pete tries to pick it up with the broom to toss it, and the damn thing slithers under the shelf. Of course, while all this is happening, time's ticking away and I am dangerously close to being late for work. Cops (finally) show up (just as I leave), can't find the damn thing, confess that they wouldn't know what in the world to do with it if they did, and then leave. And no pest control company is free to come right away. That, of course, was the moment Slithers here decides to make his entrance again, and glides over to the washing machine, where he stays for a couple of minutes before making a run for the pantry. The pantry. Full of boxes and lovely places to hide. Double argh. Cops come back for round two, drag everything out of the pantry, and have no luck and leave. Again. Meanwhile, Pete's stuck watching that Slithers doesn't get into the house. Again. Eventually, he has a brainwave that we try Pestbusters, who, thankfully, agree to come (thank god for friends in weird industries), and I rush home to let them in so Pete can get to work. To cut a long story short - the Pestbusters crew arrives. The three guys hole themselves up in the pantry, and less than 15 minutes later, emerge with the, grr, thing. In a plastic bag. He, apparently, climbed into the bristles of a broom head to hide, and I told them to just take the whole dang broom head please thankyouverymuch. They check for eggs, skins, and anything else that might hint that the bugger's been here for a while, and for friends, and the place, fortunately, is clean. Thank god. He (great chap named Azman) figures the tree-cutting going on downstairs might have driven the bugger in. By the time the whole ordeal is over, the better part of five hours has gone by. As it turns out, Slithers turns out to be a Paradise Tree Snake (Chrysopelea paradisi) that is among five species of FLYING snakes. Shudder. It was kinda small like I said, but apparently it rarely grows beyond two feet long, so guessing the one we saw may not be a "baby".... According to good ole' Google, we've learned that its not so dangerous to humans, although I swear it near caused us both a heart attack.... (Oh, before I forget, if you ever have any pesky pest problems, we'd really recommend Pestbusters - quick, efficient, very sweet, and they don't have a million excuses for why they simply can't this or that, unlike some of the others we called). Sighs. What a day. Will be happy to never, ever, ever see another snake again. Maybe we should move to snakeless Ireland. At least for peace of mind. Art